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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

sagittarius a

I have, perhaps for the first time in my life and academic matters already under control. I feel good, and I get to sleep, and I’m on top of my homework. This is the place to be nice. I love to be like this. When there is something that threatens hard-won peace of mind, it leaves me ample room to increase the anger of my country, my talons shake out, and roared. Especially when the blast from the past as the saying goes.

Long story short (I’m trying to, in fact) is that when I went to college two years ago, I broke up with my friend (we were on and off for three years). Less than two months later to receive the word not only has received his new girlfriend, he apparently proposed. Well. That was a little difficult to handle. So this was an idiot move on my part to allow them to visit me in college when asked to do so. I am a nice person, which can sometimes come back to bite me in the ass. I even – eventually – it was quite with the possibility of having them possibly children. There were rumors she was pregnant. I’m good with this now. I’m good with life, and where it led me since then, and I would like to think that I am doing well (on some days more, some days less, but that’s life, too). I’m even okay with each of them being in the community college literally half an hour on the road, because hey, I do not run the risk of falling into any place in the campus. Therefore, I am gold.

If I’m as golden as I say I am, why I am bringing this up?

When I opened my computer to check my e-mail, Twitter, and Facebook – and perhaps do some Liming with my sister before she left work for home – I see that there is a notification box on the desk of the target. Name of the screen.

Hell. No. (in fact it was not hell that passed over my head, but I would like to try and keep my blog clean to some extent, so this is what you get).

I’m happy where I am in life. I am happy to be where I am, and the people I surround myself with, and not there. Way. At. Hell. Are. Them. Come. Anywhere. Near. Me.

My compassion and goodwill only goes so far. And, at this time in my life, because they do not include them. If you think I should be given the opportunity to bury the hatchet and extend an olive branch, I do not need drama in my life, they carry the drama like a second skin. I do not want or need it, honestly. I’ve got no problem with the bury the hatchet, persay, but give me an olive branch and if they come in handy, I’m gonna start hitting.

I am stronger for the trials that I have encountered, and the paths that I passed by, and despite of the doors had been spotted in the shadows and others in the pure sunlight, and has toured both in and out from the other side for the better.

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